Class of 2005

Cira

What would you like for graduation? Some little girls want a car and some want cloths or an exotic vacation. Some want a big fancy party. But some want snakes. So we got a pair of Brazilian Rainbow Boas. She earned a 3.6 over-all and she is going to De Anza next year. I'm happy and very proud of her.

I've learned to like the snakes; they are very mellow and soothing to handle. And strikingly beautiful. Happily, I'm over my snake phobia now, her graduation gift to me, and I suppose if we keep going I could learn to get over myself, completely. That would be a giant leap in evolution.

Father's Day Gift

3Ous Here we are, just the three of us. Soon to develop into ten little Indians. My dad, James Richard Carls went off to the Korean War shortly after this photo was taken. I did not recognize him when he came back. I still don't know him very well. I forced him to teach me how to drive. We have been at odds since then.

I send him books and interesting mysteries to solve and he solves them with dogged determination. One time, I caused a riot on Christmas day by sending a box of gifts without the little cards that say who should get which wrapped package. I keep changing my phone answering habits and used to leave gag messages on my answering machines. I thought it would be more humorous than annoying but it seems to have been most annoying to the folks at home.

This year, for his birthday/Father's Day, I sent him a large print book by James Brady, about the Korean War; but it was out of print and came from a private individual who was selling a used copy through Amazon. By the grace of god and my dad's perseverance, he found out that it was me who sent it. It is interesting to me what the imagined solution of the puzzle was, compared to the true solution.

Anyway, thanks dad for the mass of curly hair and 5'10'' height, I got from you.

Lords of Dogtown

dogtown

Lords of Dogtown went to second run theatres with impressive speed. Why? Is this part of a strategy to move it to cult classic by artificial means? The DVD could be smoking. I think this is a great movie. There is a story; it is all story: lots of action, character development, romance. This is the kind of docu-drama that has something for everyone. Even guys. Yeah guys.

Story of a time and place, and a happening. Something changed forever. My life, those wheels. and the sport that evolved from another sport, and became part of a lifestyle that did not depend on access to surf. Brought it inland to urban America.

I criticize the cloths (costumes too clean, new, neat, obviously modern), the PG13 rating (so not true of what was really going on) and Heath Ledger's teeth. Very distracting. His acting was fantastic but those damn false teeth got in the way of my accepting him in character. That was a mistake.

I lament that so few people will sit through the credits. My movie partner did so this time, under protest. One other person behind us stayed. The music was great and the credits ended with shots of the original Z Boys skating. Stay for the credits folks.

Secret coffee spot

Krispy Kreme Coffee is hot and really good at the Krispy Kreme drive-through. It is my most valuable secret source of coffee: easy on, easy off, never a line in these times of low-carb obsession. The only trick is driving through without buying a dozen warm, melt in your mouth glazed doughnuts. I admit I bought one the first time but I have resisted most mornings since then. I made up the rule that I could only try each variety once, ever. So I'm not in a big hurry to complete sampling the menu choices. I try to make a late morning latte last until early afternoon. So good for your java jones!

What's for dinner?

eggplchoke These are artichokes that are dark purple in color, have minimal spines, and very small chokes. They have a more fibrous texture and slightly earthy taste. Did a brave eggplant invade the sacred breeding ground of the artichoke to form this strange fruit? Take two...they are small.

We ate them while watching the taped season finale of "Lost". I hope the build up is worth it. They were quite generous and provided flashbacks for all the major characters that had rolled out over the first season. This could be one of the few (two?) shows worth watching on local channels. Will this show blossom in it's second season? We hope.

60 minutes with Mina

I need a therapy session right now. My therapist has opted for a shorter commute and I have lost her, but she has gained quality in her everyday life that is deserved.

Many aspects of my life are out of control. When I have no control, it is very hard for me to let go. I have always been a fight or flight person, when a crisis hits. When cornered, I usually try to solve the problem to my own satisfaction, or run away.

This strategy served me well in the past, so it is very difficult to change that pattern. Self preservation kept me alive and moving forward in life. I never gave up, but I did walk away when I could not solve the problem.

I am learning how to just take a deep breath and let what is happening be OK. And keep going. Keep going to work every day, keep loving my kid. Keep managing to get from paycheck to paycheck. SSRI's help. (Selective Seritonin Re-uptake Inhibitors) A lot.

I told Mina that I had started a blog for Caitlin and that it was also going to be an outlet for me to spew when she (Mina) was no longer around. I made a fake one hour session appointment in my calendar today. 60 minutes with Mina, means I get to carve an hour out of my busy schedule , to think about what I CAN do to improve my own life. Then, after I have de-compressed and flushed my buffer, I can go back to taking care of everyone else. I have put off my own vacation too long but I recognize that and have plans for treating myself soon.

The bloody details of what is pushing me over the precipice today are boring and really not significant. Doing something about it before I crash, IS important. Choosing to do something to rescue myself is the right thing to do. That is what I learn from Mina.

I need to take care of myself the way I try to take care of others. Like my little dog, and my kid, and my job, and my parents, and on and on.

And so should you. When every day is Groundhog Day, learn to like Sonny and Cher "I Got You, Babe"

CraigsList - Truck trade - SF Bay area or anywhere in the universe

Craigslist is a great place to buy and sell things and even hook up by placing local personnal ads. That is what I have heard anyway.
So far I've received 20 offers to buy my truck. Which would be cool if I wanted to sell it.
But no...I had this brilliant idea that I could find someone to TRADE with on Craigslist! No takers but I have not heard from any alien civizations yet. Maybe someone out there will have an automatic transmission vehicle to trade for my 98 Ford Ranger. Maybe they won't call it a truck.
I noticed a little link at the bottom of my posting form asking if I want to transmit my listing to outer space. Sure, yes please!

Friday night date

I have a date with Bill most Friday nights. He got me through the election. But now what are we going to do until mid-August '05? Gotta catch his standup act. Or wring a few more laughs out of the re-runs thanks to DVR. Luv you Bill...till then...I cry.

Mom and me

mom Me - 3 months old maybe. June maybe. Allegany for sure. Happy Mother's day mom. Orma Belle (Bloomingdale) Carls.

The Stanford Powwow

powwow
This year we broke tradition and went on Saturday. I still have never been there after dark but that is something to look forward to, yes? It was well attended on Sat...crowded even and not so easy to get a view of the dancing.
This year it was all about earrings. I got the predictable pair of turquoise and silver with black accents, like a sunset, and a pair, silver with little clusters of 4 opals each. C was able to shop for her own much more elaborate earrings for her newly pierced ears. Rain is expected on Sunday (mother's day), our usual day at the Powwow. Sunday will be prom dress shopping day this year.

The Stanford Powwow May 6-8, 2005

Lick Observatory Tix

lick Summer visitor program is open for tickets on May 16th.

Remember "Firefly" ?

Firefly

Trailer released for the first of three movies based on the SciFi adventure series by Joss Whedon. "Serenity" the movie is due to be released Sept 30.

Today's Special - Bubble Rapt

PERPETUAL BUBBLEWRAP this is an oldy but goody. Take a couple swipes at it. Then navigate back to many other time wasters. Nice archive of silly games.

Brave New VoiCes

poetrygirl

is at BNV in SF today through Sunday. Go girl go! Luv ya. ooxx

Y profile lies

42 born 1963

I'm 53 this year 2005. On April 4th, my friend gave me back 10 years as a gift, and my daughter gave me back another year. Making me 42, and that is the year I took this passport photo. Fascinating.

I scare myself when I look in the mirror now. You would think that would drive me to lift up my face and/or wear more make-up or at least get a mature woman's haircut, but no it is a devil's haircut, I chop it myself!

Daily sPam

indietits.com- these birds are hipper than you

click the pig

The secret word today is QMF...so what if that is not a word; it still merits a scream.

Magic Eye

These make great wallpaper and train your brain to zone.

Astronomy Picture of the Day

Astronomy Picture of the Day go here now and every day to get a hint about who we really are.

Haiku du jour

warm bright day Today
keep silent council yourself
of your own concerns

East coast black-out Sat photo

BO8142003 Where were you when the lights went out?

Ode to Billy Joel

One day, not long ago, the car would not start. Grey SAAB. Syracuse. 1977. Why?

Why should it start? Seven inches of snow accumulated on the roof and hood. Crisp, crunchy on top and fluffy below, easy enough to push it off but the cold grips all and has frozen the car, the motor, the oil. Why should she wake up? She is sleeping deeply and numbed by the freezing air. Gusts of wind blow a few flakes into swirling devils along the street. Not inspiring. Nothing to warm or encourage. Just destiny. Got to get to school. Got to get to work. Want to go to a concert tonight. We have comps for Billy Joel and I want to break loose the wheels that are frozen tight into icy ruts. Buried up over the bumper in dirty snow scraped from the street.

My gloved hands command, turn the key, speak with urgency, but finally give up. Silence. Not tonight. Not tomorrow morning. But maybe...try again when the noontime sun has warmed the street and the car. Maybe then, the damn car will start. I walk crunch, crunching, along in the empty plowed street to the bus stop. The quality of sound in the dark when the temp is below zero, is bright and crisp as the layer of crusty ice that covers everything. Yet all sounds are muted and the bus moves in slow motion.

Yes, well the seats sucked and the acoustics sucked so was it worth it? We had comps so...